You’ve done the work. You breathe a sigh of relief. It’s the right answer.
Except, it may not be.
“Right” can mean so many things:
Make sure when it’s the right answer, it is the right answer. Like a good math student, you should always check your work.
If you don’t have the time to do this, you probably are making too many decisions.
Ever since we humans controlled fire, there is an inclination to think of it as purely our pet. We even talk about it as that way in our stories. In the story, we receive fire from Prometheus. Fire isn’t a force of nature, but a gift to humanity to spite the gods.
Fire, however, is a naturally occurring thing.
Forests last a long time. Fire is a big reason.
Forests accumulate deadwood. Deadwood, once it accumulates, chokes away the forest because it takes resources. That’s where fire comes in. Fire eliminates the deadwood. It clears the ground so that new things can grow. If there is no fire, then the forest dies.
When we cut ourselves, we get scabs. They look ugly. We shouldn’t however, scratch them off. Scabs are necessary; they keep the body safe from infection.
One of a leader’s most critical skills is the awareness and understanding of deadwood and scabs. The treatment for one (deadwood) is the exact cause of death for the other (scabs).
Tomorrow I am going to talk about how different styles tend to one or the other. For now, think about experiences in your life where you needed to burn things off or when you needed to let things “sit.”
This month began as a mystery to me. “Starting small” is a general term. I mean different things to different people. This month, I engaged with that generality and got some interesting conclusions.
First, however, is what I knew coming into the month:
When preparing those ideas, I realized there were several aspects of “small” that which we have to deal. Things, like the small chunks of time that happen between meetings, the little mistakes that we ignore, and a little context all affect us.
These things change us in ways we don’t imagine, both for better and for worse. Taking the time to think about and prepare for these events don’t just make us feel better, but make us smarter for doing so.
We aren’t alone, nor are we robots. We get in our way. We don’t know everything.
But, through working on what we do, and taking things one day at a time, we can do great things. All it takes is patience, and the ability to breathe.
From there, much is possible. Two minutes is enough to start.
I am a big fan of calendaring these days. 15 to 30 minutes on Sunday allow me to keep track of the incoming and outgoing quite efficiently.
With that said, I noticed something when I started keeping track of the meetings and my lateness (by paying for everyone’s food/drink. If you want to remember something add a pain point). I realized that small decisions made after the meeting created more tardiness than any other decision.
What is a small decision post-meeting?
It’s the little discussions that happen after the meeting finishes, after “closing remarks” that keep it going.
Some examples:
All of these things are critical to maintaining a relationship, and all of them quietly add a few minutes. It takes a meeting from 4 – 4:30 and makes it 4 – 4:45.
So, when scheduling a meeting, make sure you either:
We all have 24 hours in a day. There isn’t anyone who has 23 or 25. You can’t “save” time. You only spend it.
Time’s consistency combined with its scarcity is a major reason it’s the most valuable resource we have.
Our default state is to react to time:
All of these things are reactive. None of those instances create memories. You won’t tell people at the bar later about that email that started you on a project. It isn’t a life that is memorable. When someone asks about what you were doing, all you say is you were “busy.”
When one is reactive, they rely on the word busy. Busy is a buzzword designed to protect your ego. When you say your busy, you don’t have to think about why you decided to do something. You take away your personal responsibility.
At the end of the day, would you rather be busy or memorable?
Yesterday’s newsletter (sign up, won’t you?) talked about the pendulum, and why it’s an important visual tool to describe volatility with decisions.
We base our emotions on getting the “yes” and depending on how excited the decision makes us, that determines how strong we will “push.”
The decision on how hard to “push” comes from our emotions and our excitement towards them. If I am happy or sad based on a decision then I “push” it.
After the push, there are aftershocks (the swings after the initial push). The pendulum cannot “rest” until it’s out of energy.
So, the “yes” or “no” still has some power after that first push. This is important because they – the aftershocks – advertently or inadvertently affect our other pendulums (other “yes” or “no” decisions).
In short, our decisions are powerful and have lasting effects. They go beyond the moment we make them.
We are not islands, and pretending does us no good.
According to Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky, we have two modes of thought.
We can do a ton of things with “System 1” thinking, but it comes with a bunch of caveats. For example, you miss out on any critical thinking. A lot of people mistake the ability to walk and chew gum as the ability to “multitask.” It isn’t multitasking, it’s auto-pilot.
However, the “multitasking” one thinks about has to do with being able to do so with “System 2” thinking. Each time you change tasks with “System 2” thinking you end up with switching costs and the work suffers.
Pay attention to the work. If you find yourself thinking, realize it is “System 2” don’t do anything else after you define a start and end point. Allow the rest of the world to come back after the work.
Trust me, it’s not going anywhere.
Asking is difficult for me.
I take pride in doing things on my own. As a result, I often either reinvent the wheel or miss out on opportunities.
Learning how to ask, wherever you are in an organization or community, is powerful because it both tells someone what you need and allows someone to help you. They feel connected to you, and you, in turn, feel connected to the work you are doing.
Human beings are social animals.
Below is an exercise that will help you with getting used to asking.
This exercise goes further than the superficial, allows you to pick what is contextually important, it digs into your thinking, and most importantly, it allows you to ritualize asking the asking of questions.
The normal result is often that people are often on your side and what to help you succeed.
Don’t miss out.
Hear me out.
In Christian mythology, the most “devout” Christians in Rome would be offered as a sacrifice. They had a chance to escape the lions den if they converted. So, the trouble in which they found themselves made them consider their belief and mortality.
Nothing creates focus like stakes. They had skin in the game.
If one attempts creative work, chances are they are going to find themselves in this predicament. The “Romans” might throw you into the lions den for not converting.*
Even if it’s metaphorically the same, the stakes aren’t as high. The thing is our brain doesn’t know the difference. It still thinks we are headed to a lion’s mouth, al dente.
The thing is there are no lions other than our fears, and by not letting them eat us up, we still get the benefits of the focus on how we really feel.
*It might be worth your time to convert
If you want to grow, start deciding.
When you start making those decisions, get a journal and write them down.
We agonized over wrong and right, the future, the past, and its potential. The odd thing is, in 99% of our decisions, none of those things mattered. What mattered was follow through and accountability.
It’s easy to fall into the “routine of comfort,” or the things that we do to feel OK. We all have a list, but for me, if I notice myself watching sports, diving in on Reddit, or perusing Facebook, then I am there. I am hiding, trying to avoid something. That’s failure.
We can’t avoid failure. But by avoiding follow through and accountability, we shrink our chances of growth.
From the desk of Adam Thomas 