garlic – From the desk of Adam Thomas

Our emotions play a role.

Yesterday I laid out the Garlic Problem, or what our options are when we smell of garlic.

There were rational options, and then there was running away as fast as we could.

You say:

“I would never run away from the table.”
“I would know they don’t want me gone.”

The example yesterday sounds ridiculous, but it’s a game that we play every day. Our fight or flight instincts always have a say in everything we do.

So what are we supposed to do here, ignore it?

No. I have bad news, every time you just ignore the game, you accumulate emotional debt. (emotional debt is the after effect of an emotion.) You ever watch someone scream at a printer? That’s emotional debt trying to collect.

We have to reconcile the idea of emotions matter, and they exist. We can’t ignore them, that leads to other problems. We have to connect with them, listen, and then understand that we can say “no.”

Then you can wash your hands, and get back to the conversation.

We Aren’t Logical, So Prepare For It

When you eat garlic, the smell gets on your hands, around your mouth, and on your breath. People notice, but mostly, you care. Should you do something?

Options:

Do nothing.

You can excuse yourself, go to the bathroom, wash your hands, and pop in a stick of gum.

You could either register this change as the start of a catastrophe and run away from the dinner.

While we sit here and read this, the first two options seem reasonable. With no skin in the game, you recognize the best choice is the second, but you could live with the first.

The last choice seems insane. In life, when you add emotion, it isn’t that simple.

You can feel the slight change of disposition in the room. And in our worst moments, it can cause us to lose perspective.

When the pressure is on, the third option becomes much more reasonable in our heads.

Tomorrow – I’ll talk about why this is important.