Tag: Habit

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I SUCK! Helps You Get Better

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I don’t like looking at my stand up comedy videos. Instead of reminding me of what I did in that moment that night, it reminds me of where I was with stand up in 2012. It isn’t that I hate stand up comedy, I still do it often and every so often I receive compliments. The video is one place in time and within I see my flaws. Some things that pop out to me quickly are that I have a hat on, my volume control is bad, I’m stuck in place not performing.After I get over cringing at what I see, I remind myself that this means I am getting better. In order to join the realms of the professional, you have to learn how to keep your critical eye on. If you don’t you won’t find the flaws that can make you a great and you risk getting stuck and staying the same.

Finding your flaws suck. We all want success all the time. When I see my own flaws, I get this pit of my stomach feeling, the one where you clutch your arm in embarrassment and wonder if anyone is looking at you. I want it to go away in that moment, and never come back. It is easy to take this moment and start it as an excuse to beat yourself up (you don’t do anyone any favors with this approach). The better option is to start the note taking process. Learn the flaws you see, because each one is a chance to get better. Even just self identifying them, is a step up in the right direction. You are getting good enough to see what you can’t do, and the next step is simply working to get to it.

When you are happy, you risk plateauing. The good thing about plateauing is that it doesn’t feel bad to do it. If you are good enough to get past the lay person, well, you mind can throw a party “congratulations, you can stop.” You know some parlour tricks and get attention. If you don’t want to master the skill, this is as good a place as any to stop, however, if you plan on being a master at anything, this is when you panic. If you aren’t taking a critical eye to your skills, it is a good chance they will start to erode. If I loved my stand up comedy videos, no way would I have taken the time to learn volume control, making expressions, and stage movement. I would still be standing there, telling jokes, being the same comedian I was in 2012.

Getting better is painful, and its going to suck to look at old video, writing, or any other performance. This is a good thing. By staying the same, and simply enjoying what you have done, you cannot become a professional. Your flaws aren’t a bad thing, they are a road map to your future success or your voice. Plateauing takes away your critical eye and it leads you to being stuck. For some things, this is fine (I am not aiming to become a professional musician, so I’m satisfied knowing where the keys are and a few tunes) but when you aim for greatness, it is a recipe for disaster. So if you’re scared that you suck, rest assured, you’re on the road to getting better.

 

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Sleep Isn’t Evil

They’re not many fans of sleep, and they are all to ready to let you know it. It’s a conversation that gets thrown around so much, I get guilty about how much I sleep.

People take sleep deprivation as a badge of honor.

I walked around my office Friday, and the same sleep conversation come up.

“How many hours did you sleep?”

“4”

“That’s good – I get 3 1/2 – I heard the Managing Director gets 2”

Sleep has become a myth. Needing it has become a tool of the week. Sleep deprivation is only for the true hackers in my beloved corp.

When I was growing up, it was something I watched in my household.

My father was the best example. He slept routine began with the blaring of late night TV piped into his home office. He would listen, not watch, The Tonight Show(his choice was Leno as opposed to Letterman) and begin to wind down as Conan started. He would then go up stairs to his bedroom, and lay down about 1 AM. His alarm would then start to blare at 4:30 as he got ready to drive into work. Even on the weekends, he isn’t much for catching up, as he is down around 2 AM and up at 7 AM. He counts six hours of sleep as a reprieve.  I think he told me I slept too much once, not in a mean way, but “Adam, why do you sleep so much?”

My mom, the same way, as well as my brothers and sister. Even my roommate now looks at me strange. He isn’t as nice as my father – “How do you sleep so much, what are you lazy?”

 

 

I sleep 7 1/2 hours per night on average. I woke up this morning thinking how strange it is that getting 8 hours of sleep that our bodies need is frowned upon. A little research let me know that I wasn’t lazy or crazy for wanting my beauty sleep .

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Organization & Routine

Organization has always been difficult for me. I don’t keep things neat at all. Throwing things around always felt normal, and I never really mind when it becomes time to find things. I just became better at retrieval, when I was in my house especially, at taking some time to find what I had thrown about recently.

This all felt normal until I decided to take the challenge of making my room clean. I was a classic example of the male bachelor, clothes thrown everywhere in the room, trash bandied about, and a messy bed. I would call in a maid every few months and get a brand new room, only to have it collapse in a week or so.

That changed when I made a routine at night to clean up the floor for at most of 5 minutes. I ordered a maid and made it a point to start the night after she left. Very little to do, it felt like I could carry out something with no effort. It was a little win, and it was nice to have a clean floor.

It has been three months, and I woke up this morning realizing it has been a long time since there has been even more than 5 pieces of clothing on the floor. The power of the habit has amazed. No more than 5 minutes a night, cleaning my floor. I wish I had known this when I was younger.

The habit has expanded to the trash being taken out and the dishes being washed, and they too, went from mounds of work to about 3 minutes a night of keeping my apartment clean. Small wins matter, and hopefully, this can translate into my creative life. Organization is key for me to free up mind space, and getting my external world in order should help me get my internal engine going.

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Bruce Lee Genius

Be like water – Bruce Lee

Sometimes I don’t see this quote for the genius that it is. At the surface, you can see it as water being flexible. “Water becomes the cup.” However, water also does two things.

  1. It is as powerful as it needs to be to get to where it is going – there is nothing stopping a river from flowing. Even if you dam the river – if you don’t redirect, one day, whether it is a week or a thousand years, the water will break the dam.

  2. It is always moving. Even water in a puddle is pushing against the ground, smoothing, sanding, and digging into the world. If it finds itself unable to accomplish its task in time, it reverts into air, only to come down as rain again to try once more.

So. Be like water.

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Returning Habits

Habits are had to get started again once you lose them.

I recently went on vacation, and decided to detach from my routines. No more push ups, no writing, no thinking – just letting things go for the duration.

I thought this would relax me, however, when I returned, I found that my life was wrapped around disorder – instead of peace, I returned to chaos.

This week has been dedicated to slowly return to my habits, something that I thought would be easy, but it getting difficult – I forgot how I did things, and even why. I haven’t written anything down, and for that I find myself lost.

With that said, I am glad I recorded what the habits were on lift.do – so I have a roadmap to recovery.

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Writing Essays

I find myself writing more essays in my free time this week. There is no rhyme or reason to this quite yet, but it is happening.

Who knows if they will ever go public. Just stuff that has to be “gotten off my chest.”

Hopefully they just come off honest. They are the first essays since my school days, so by no means are they publishable, but it is work that reworks my old journalism muscles.

Where this gets me, or what I can even do with them is a mystery. But, I wonder what will come from my desk if this continues as a habit.

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Comedy Crossroad

I have found myself more at a crossroad than ever regarding my act as a comedian.

What is funny? Where does it come from? And what is my growth process?

I have to become funnier – but also, I have to be able to take the chance to become unique.

Where does that uniqueness come from? Most importantly, how do I get it on paper – then out of my mouth to the crowds,bookers, and comedians who will help champion my cause.

I haven’t been to an open mic in almost a month, something I will be changing shortly, but I feel like these questions should be answered before I apply the gas again.

There is time – as long as you create it.

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Trying to be Smooth

I was late again this morning. I got out of bed at 8 15, which is something that I wanted to avoid. It is a full hour over when I should be getting up, which resulted in a late start at work, something that I still need to figure out how to get out of.

I feel like I am slipping when this happens. I was able Tuesday to get out the gate here at work, and start working as soon as I got it. It was a good feeling, even if I had nothing to really do. I see the difference with how I work when I have a clean palate in the morning, and I tend to be distracted when I don’t.

No rest for the weary. I have to keep up with this, and do it everyday. If I can make it for a month, Ill be able to latch onto it. I am quite happy with a clear slate for a month. If I can do that, who knows what I will be able to think up and get accomplished. Just have to execute.

With that said, I was a little tired when I woke up. My sleep times have been creeping towards 1, with no practical reason to be up that late. I would like to train myself to sleep at 1 and wake up at 7 due to me maybe being on late night, but for now, there is no reason to be up that late. I may not even get it. So, I will be monitoring my sleep times, and pushing them back to a healthier 12 and maybe 11 some nights to make sure I am well rested for the upcoming day.

I am currently redrawing my lines for the workplace. I find that while I am good with a clean room, and I see it spreading to a clean house, my office space is still a mess. I want to be able to come to work in a clean area, and I am not doing it.

Clean area, clean mind. It is where I want to be in all aspects of my life, so I have to start getting it in all areas of my life.

Why be good in one area and not good in another. I have to establish some office habits to improve my work habits. The rest of this week will be devoted to researching what I actually do. I want this to be smooth sailing just like my mornings and evenings are becoming.

I will be breaking this down into morning office and night office routines. I will be bringing my coffee and pills over and try to make it a habit of getting things together here in the office. Making a smooth transition from beginning and ending an office day.

I want to make this work…

Therapy last night was very good. I got to discuss some of the things that have been bothering me at work. Not being able to work from home has been a bit of a hamper on my work schedule. I would also like to know when or if I am getting the raise I was due.

I have to make waves in getting some of this stuff done. I realized some of this is my fault, but I need to get that part under control. From there I can get a smoother office experience.

The other half, and maybe the whole session really, was based in my fear of speaking to people. I can do it fine when I am drunk, or oddly enough, I can do it great when I am in person next to people. What I am not good at is calling and re-connection. It is keeping the stove warm in relationships that eludes me. I have this internal fear that people don’t want to speak to me, and I rationalize it when I don’t call.

Adding automation to this I think, is imperative for me to be better at it. If I am forced in the conversations, I will be better at talking, even if it is something simple as a text. I have to talk to people. I have to make connections.

If I can sync this up, ill be stronger in everything else I try to accomplish. Discipline.

Its hot today, and I guess summer is here. I also guess that my electricity bill will be quite high in the coming months. I want to compensate as much as possible with the roommate situation. A little more money will help me a bit in getting this other stuff under control.

I probably will be running my air conditioner all summer long with no breaks in between. I know that it will be a tad more expensive, but peace of mind is worth the price. I remember the summer I moved to the city, and it was quite hot. I just had a box fan, and for the most part, my apartment was miserable. I hated being home, and I hated my apartment until late September.

I have a lot more people living in my apartment now, so I better keep it cool.

Comedy at Bar None today, and I want to work and get back into the rotation there. I need to get the habit of being in places every Thursday, and Zito’s show and the Pear once a month isn’t cutting it. I need to add maybe two more shows every Thursday.

I want to build another skill, and I think I am adding Vine to my list of things. Even if I stink, I would like to have a body of work for people to look at. I might as well get on the ground floor because I have an iPhone.

If no one cares now I can scrap it in the future. What is the worst that can happen.

Do: 16/8 | CPAP | Wrap Up | 3 Things | Push Ups | Water
Don’t: To Do | Vegetable Juice | Thank You | Meditation

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Growth Process

If I have learned nothing else in comedy, I have learned that I have to learn how to embrace failure. I didn’t get into the Laughing Devil Devil Cup festival, and for that I was a little upset. It didn’t bug me as much as things used to though. I still have an audition at the club, I still have a chance to prove myself to be on the normal roster.

I am slowly realizing what comedy is, and I think all art is like this as well. You start off with 99 no’s to 1 yes. As you get better, the scale starts to tip the other way. Soon it is 2 yes’ then 4, then 8 and soon it flips over. You gain the confidence along the way, and build the stories of someone who has been through the war.

I have been trying to groom myself to have a growth mindset. It would help a lot with that process, because I need to make the most of my opportunities. Every day I work is another day I get to turning one of those no’s into a yes. Every failure is another step to success.

I was groomed in life to have the opposite mindset, a fixed mindset. I think most people are. Basically, a fixed mindset doesn’t see the yes growing from the no’s, but as a fixed thing. A yes is a yes and a no is a no. This leads to grudges, and it shakes your confidence. 99 no’s becomes a huge wall in front of you. 99 nos makes you thing that doing any of this is impossible, pack your shit and go back home, or stick to your day job.

I feel like in a few years, each of these no’s will turn over, and I will be able to look back to see that there is positive motion in my career. I want to build, so I hope that my state of mind can go positive as well. Growth not fixed.

New roommate coming into my apartment. He is someone I mentored in college, and with him living here, it will be three guys living in a 3 bedroom. I think this will work, because it is temporary, it helps me out in the money department( I need to temper my spending habits a little more) and he is a good guy, who wants to make everything work.

I hope he does. He is arriving today to get a feel of the territory, get used to the train system, and figure out what he needs to survive when he is up here. If he makes it a permanent move, I will look for an apartment for all three of us to have our space.

If that day comes, it will be weird to move out of this place. This is my first apartment in the city, and living here has taught me a lot about being self sufficient. But I think I am thinking too far. Lets just see if the kid makes it first.

Warren Buffet 500 pages a day has stuck in my mind continuously. 500 pages is a ton of information, and when I tell other people this, they automatically dismiss it.

I have heard everything from “He has an assistant reading” to “It must be nice to be able to do nothing”. This makes me want to persue it as a habit more. The commitment to acquiring knowledge is a difficult one because most of us are scared to find the chips in our mental armor.

Getting more information scares us because it puts our sacred cows in danger. We may have to turn our back on things we knew were true. To be honest, it has slowed me down a little bit. It is an odd exercise to pick up, just to read and try to do 500 pages a day. Even so, it is compound interest. You do learn a little bit more. It is work, but if I can figure it out, I think I will be that much better off to work on my own.

Pushups every morning. I am starting small. Just ten. I want to get better form, and do them slowly. I don’t know what it will get me, but I constantly think of Bruce Wayne in Batman Begins, starting his day with 100 push ups.

Fantasy character or not, it has come to light that physical exercise makes you smarter. I want to be able to think faster, write faster, and read faster, so I guess the secret is integrate workouts faster.

Old Mixtapes have interested me lately. I am listening to Detroit by Big Sean. For the most part, since my generation has the ability to generate new material so fast, we give things 2 or 3 listens and move on.

There is a lot of joy in some of these older recordings. It goes along with my process this year of simplifying and taking in art as a whole. There are lessons to be received in them if you just listen.

*They told me no and I reversed it I’m on. *

Should have kept in Roy Hibbert. I think this will be a more interesting series though. Heat in 6, but the Pacers are not going to go out without a fight.

Do: 3 Things | Wrap up | Pushups
Not: Meditation | Vegetable Juice | 16/8(15/9) | CPAP | To do | Water | Thank You

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Chilly.

Got the AC on. My apartment feels like an apartment should feel. After a day of sitting around in a sweat-box, I feel like we have some central air going. I don’t think I am going to turn it off either. I want it constantly cold in here so I don’t ever have to wait.

I tell myself that every summer, and I wonder why I hardly ever follow it. There has got to be something there, why I always turn off the AC, anytime I feel like it is getting even slightly chilly. Honestly, if I just suffered for a little bit, I won’t have to worry about much after that.

I have the next 6 days off. This should be fun, considering I did all of my errands Monday and Tuesday. I used to be able to just go somewhere, and try to hang around friends, but lately, I don’t feel like doing that. I feel like working on my comedy career, doing a few creative things, and focusing on making these habits stick.

6 Days alone, with no one telling me I need to go anywhere, feels like the perfect opportunity to get stuck in my habits, so when work begins later next week, I can just follow through, and use less brain power as a whole getting anything done.

Are you improving? Today I read a post on The Mistake Bank that asked that very question. I constantly get lost in other metrics, in everything I do. Its easy to ask yourself, what did _____ get, and how did he get that.

Logically, I know that is the quickest way to bad emotion. What I mean by bad emotion, is unjust depression. Jealousy fuels you into making mistakes. I don’t need to make any mistakes when it comes to anything, whether it be comedy, design, or writing. If I only focus on my own metrics – just getting myself better, making the race about me, I feel like I could get a lot farther.

Truth is though, that is a lot harder than it sounds. People push thier success around and my depression makes it a lot easier to listen to, and to feel defended by. I think one of the main things i want to work on this year, besides habits, is to build a relationship with my depression, in order to help mitigate those feelings.

I want to be focused on me, and I think that means guiding my depression into another direction.

Going to make some comedy stops today. I figure with the time off, I can make some connections, shake some hands and kiss some babies. I want to audition at a bunch of clubs before the end of the summer, and this campaign helps.

I really want to get into some of the more, shall we say, obscure comedy clubs in the city. A lot of people want to get in at the Comic Strip, and Stand Up NY, but I would like to see if I can get into the rotation at places like Tribeca Comedy, LOL, HA, and Laughing Devil.

I want to build some more confidence in my material, and get used to working longer sets when I can. I also want to get into more bar show rotations, and get some of my skill up that way. I think that is the way to get me going, and to improve the fastest.

Those clubs make me nervous, but I have to realize, that I have to start getting myself out there, and a no just means come back in a few months. I have to start taking more chances, and I need to actually get out there to start taking them. If I can, there is a lot more stage time in my future.

Get that stage time.

Deciding on output is the hardest thing to do. I want to make the best move in terms of getting something out there, but I have to say that in doing that, I am freezing myself out of making any real potential progress.

I have this fear, that people will laugh, just by speaking up. Logically, I know going through this will only make me stronger, speaking out, asking dumb questions, and getting the ideas to work again next time. Getting a hundred thumbs down is bad, but at least you have a bar to begin with.

Logically I know that. Emotionally, I don’t. I keep myself shielded from failure because I don’t want to experience someone calling me stupid, or telling me that you can never try again.

In the modern world, that just doesn’t make sense anymore, because there are a million venues to try, and a million ways to get what you want. The road always goes somewhere. Just have to make that work.

New 99u Book is out. I plan on reading it, and reading it a lot. Hopefully that can be done by the end of this weekend.

Done: 3 Things Wrap Up Push Ups
Not Done: Meditation To-do 16/8 Water Thank You Vegetable Juice CPAP

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