Tag: november

Good or Bad… No, Just Grey – Lessons from November 2017

Post author By jrlsage
Post date November 30, 2017

Change is hard

If there is a theme on this blog, more than self-awareness, execution, and direction – it’s that different is difficult.

No need to spice it up, it’s a mound of trouble as is.

We, though, spice it up. Without much of a prompt, we attach labels like good and bad around the work and relationships that we have.

It doesn’t matter that we are mostly wrong, we just do.

The world isn’t either sunshine or rain. It is often a mixture of both, along with wind for good measure.

To get out of the metaphor for a moment – shit’s complicated. When we react, we oversimplify and engage without consideration.

Those labels just make the world harder to see, and often, are just rationalizations for our reaction.

Different is difficult. It requires a lot of “extra” just to make something happen. You have to get over yourself and your reaction to take a bigger view.

Reacting takes us away from the ability to see more.

And if you want to change (the world and yourself), seeing is a requirement.

Books – My Goodreads Account

Newsletter – Subscribe Here

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Life As Usual Video Blog

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I created a video blog that delivers these lessons in a visual medium. Curious? Subscribe above and get a notification as soon as they come out.

Tags november, outro, Reactive Relativity

Blog Post

FOCUS! Getting Into November, a lot! What I Learned This Month.

Post author By jrlsage
Post date November 30, 2015

Focus is hard.

That is why we avoid it. That is the biggest insight I came up with during this month. November is a busy time. People scramble to get the big “work” done before the holidays. Plans get drawn up for the travel that we do. T’s get crossed and i’s get dotted, at least the ones we remember, so the focus is on family and some of the other stress that comes from that.

So, in the midst of all that, I decided to focus on “focus”. I ended up learning a lot, crafting some frameworks, and made an upgrade on my writing. I got to understand myself a little more, and I think taking what I learned from this month is a force multiplier that helps everything else I do.

Wins:

Fear–I went after fear a lot this month, and took it on in different ways. From breathing techniques, to frameworks, to meditation, I learned a ton about fear and some of the things that scare fear itself (preparation especially)
- Lesson: Negative visualization, using mental models, and earning presence by planning (and recognizing that “everyone has a plan until they are punched in the mouth”
Video (New Thing) – Like my newsletter last month, I started a video blog series. I think it gets better each week. Check them out here.
- Lesson: Just do it. Ship, and see the results. Experimentation is fine, no one is going to get you for shipping. If the world doesn’t like it, they will reject and look for the next thing you do all the same.
Vulnerability–I read a quote this month – “There are no boring subjects, just boring writers” that I used to just compartmentalized to writing, but it means a lot in conversation, work, and anything else we do. Taking responsibility makes for vulnerability, and we shy away from that.
- Lesson: Talk to people and be honest and be interested.

Losses:

Mediation – I didn’t mediate. As much as negative visualization helped, I didn’t do a regular practice.
- Lesson: Put something on your habits. Make them strong.
Anger–I didn’t make this a priority to deal with. I don’t know if any work got done.
- Lesson: Start using the signs around me to help me focus.
Habits – I fell out of a few habits this month.
- Lesson: Add accountability.

Important Posts

Books

Habits

5 Minute Journal– Back in!
Doodling – In the morning.

Closing The Loop

Setting Aside a Time – Just set aside a time to do this every week. Try to keep a copy of things in front of you and batch this.

Emotional Intelligence

Negative Visualization – this one is a lot harder than it looks, and when it happens, feels painful. But it makes life easier.

Network

Barbershop Books – Board meeting and new plans.
Harlem Tech – Working on something interesting…can’t say too much.

Organization

Slowly GTD – Keeps going.
Buffer – Just keep it filled and learn some stuff.

Tags Focus, monththeme, november, outro

Blog Post

Focus – I’ve Got To Get Present – Hello November 2015

Post author By jrlsage
Post date November 1, 2015

Nothing like grief to let you know where you pain points are. I have said that failure is feedback, and in a month where I focused on risk, I got hit with some serious feedback.

In short, I experienced some headaches last month.

Including:

I almost left employment
Gave up sugar / soda / carbs
Got hit with a financial bomb

I got rattled. I didn’t do anything crazy (points there – in the past, one of these things would make me Mr. Temper Tantrum) but, my focus on them took away a lot of joy in my life. I wasn’t able to enjoy the birth of my god-daughter (Hi Skyler!) but also my best friend getting engaged at a dinner to his wonderful fiancé (love you both). I wasn’t present, mentally. And instead of celebration (a coworker got married also – busy month), I turned in and didn’t get to enjoy it full force.

In pain, when you listen, there is an insight just waiting – it isn’t anyone else responsibility for my lack of presence. It is my own.

I’ve looked at this in the past, but not in crisis (like I find myself in). I’ve “tip and tricked” my way to getting full presence, but now, it will be this months focus, a real look at my presence at being present, and a focus on my focus.

It falls at a perfect time, the holidays are here and I will be in front of a lot of family, there are distractions, and its cold out.

Subthemes

Fear – I want to tackle this head on. How much does it play in my decision-making? Is there a way to practice fear management? Can I make a change in a short month?
Anger – Just like fear, how do I work on building uses for my anger? Where does it show up?
Vulnerability – I made some strides this year in dealing with it, but I never made this a focus, until now. How does this effect my curiosity? What habits can I install to force me to deal with my vulnerability?

Those are the big three topics that I want to hit, but with everything in life, things change with the minute. If you think you can help in any way, please reach out with suggestions through Twitter @TheHonorableAT.

Tags Focus, intro, monththeme, november, theme