Tag: outro

Categories
Blog Post

Delegating vs. Holistic Delegating – Lessons From September

Holistic delegation is a meta-skill

When I started unpacking the concept of regular delegation this month, I thought that I would write about just the act of giving someone something to do.

That is regular delegation.

Simple enough. However, there is more than that.

Great leaders recognize the action around the transaction as well. That regular delegation pales to “holistic delegation,” which is delegating which considers all other concerns.

Even before you give someone something to do, there are things to consider:

These questions sound like a lot of work, and they are. That’s why the focus is always important. Doing high leverage work is your leadership balance. Everything else has to fall to the side to even attempt holistic delegation.

Holistic delegating is a meta-skill. The good news is, leveling up any one of those things makes the rest doable.

So, get some coffee.

Books – My Goodreads Account

Newsletter – Subscribe Here

Did you know I send a newsletter out every Sunday? It is more personal than the blog, combining my personal stories with an overarching theme.  I also throw in some great links that I’ve found on the internet.

 

Categories
Blog Post

Freedom is… Lessons from August

Freedom Is...

Complicated

So, I think back to the coffee shop where someone asked me “What is freedom?”

I didn’t have an answer then. I don’t have one now. Freedom in both complicated in expression and concept.

However, I spent a month thinking about it.

A few lessons:

Freedom requires clarity.

It requires commitment.

You can’t run to shiny new objects, yet you have to understand yourself.

You can’t find perfection.

Freedom means taking on problems in different ways.

You have to take a step back and understand the whole problem.

While all of this is happening, you have to keep your vices in check by listening to them.

In short, it’s pretty complicated.This month gave me better questions. Questions lead to greater understanding, which leads to empathy. There is a lot of freedom just in that.

Books – My Goodreads Account

Newsletter – Subscribe Here

Categories
Blog Post

Ignition + Vision = If You Complete the Mission – Lessons from July 2016

Starting small delivers big value

This month began as a mystery to me. “Starting small” is a general term. I mean different things to different people. This month, I engaged with that generality and got some interesting conclusions.

First, however, is what I knew coming into the month:

When preparing those ideas, I realized there were several aspects of “small” that which we have to deal.  Things, like the small chunks of time that happen between meetings, the little mistakes that we ignore, and a little context all affect us.

These things change us in ways we don’t imagine, both for better and for worse.   Taking the time to think about and prepare for these events don’t just make us feel better, but make us smarter for doing so.

We aren’t alone, nor are we robots. We get in our way. We don’t know everything.

But, through working on what we do, and taking things one day at a time, we can do great things.  All it takes is patience, and the ability to breathe. 

From there, much is possible. Two minutes is enough to start. 

Books Read

Newsletter Links

Categories
Blog Post

“No” is Powerful In Many Ways – Wrap-Up For June 2016

“No” is a powerful word for discovery, too.

I started this month in one direction: “no” is a word primarily used for power dynamics.

I thought of “no” just as a way to bend one’s will.

What I realized, however, is that “no” is a word is not just a word of power. “No,” is a way to explore ourselves and the community around us.

“No” has just as much worth as a word of discovery.

“No” leads to external discovery.

Putting our ideas into the world is dangerous to our  ego because we hear the word “no.” Ideas are our babies in a sense, and because of that, sometimes we hide the idea from our community.

Except in most circumstances, our community wants us to succeed, and the only danger that could happen by putting an idea out there is hearing the word “no.”

This starts a conversation and creates pushback, a good thing. This conversation causes awareness and through that, possible alignment*. When we make those around us aware, we create a connection.

We, as human beings, crave connection. Without a connection to something, most of us can’t work at our best.

“No” leads to internal discovery:

As much as we think we always act in our best interests, we don’tIn deciding to say “yes” to ourselves all the time, we will sometimes cut off our nose to spite our face.

We have the last word when it comes to the decisions we make.The outside world is powerful in its own right, but it is worth the time to train the “kill switch.” In this case, the “kill switch” is the word “no.”

If we don’t, it leads us to some behavior that wastes energy to get “satisfaction.” These behaviors have consequences, the most important one being that they waste your time. No one keeps score.

This doesn’t mean become a robot. Our emotions matter, and are an important guide to understanding ourselves. They aren’t the end of the line. Emotions can take control,but we always have the “kill switch.”  There is always a better decision, and “no” helps us get there.

*I say possible alignment because alignment isn’t the end goal, you shouldn’t always listen to the crowd.

Top 10 Posts for the Month:

Books Read

Newsletter Links

Categories
Blog Post

Over-communicating is All About You – What I Learned in May 2016

Get selfish

Over-communicating is as much about dealing with yourself as it is dealing with another person.

That is counter-intuitive, but through looking at the world with an “over-communication” first lens, I realized that my effectiveness with carrying out tactics relied on how I dealt with internal strife.

I didn’t see this as a chance to deal with self-awareness, but here I realized that all the tactics in the world won’t help you with communicating unless you listen to yourself first.

Battles with depression, fear, and impostor syndrome came with every time I confirmed a meeting, told someone something difficult, or didn’t hedge my opinion.  Prior to this month, I got away from those things because it was uncomfortable.  I saw failure before each one of those decisions.

How many times have you confirmed a meeting with someone and felt pushy?

That feeling of being “pushy” is fear. And it obstructs you from seeing that confirmation doesn’t make you seem anxious, it makes you look like a compassionate professional .

Compassionate?

Yes, it shows respect for someone’s time and respect for their character. It displays enough vulnerability to allow them to make decisions.

Even if you fail, even if what you fear comes true, it saves you time. Time is the most valuable resource we have. Our focus and our filtering decide how effective we are in the world.

“Over-communicating” is time intensive, so you need to focus and filter.

In order to make it count, you need to understand that your “selfishness” creates the space for you to communicate effectively.

If you don’t, you end up second guessing yourself and dealing with regrets, an emotion that I find far more punishing that failure. There are failures I laugh at now, I never laugh at regrets.

So deal with the fear, get vulnerable, and don’t let regret have room. You are better for it.

Biggest Lesson – Listening to yourself gives you the ability to over-communicate, and therefore become more effective to the world around you.

Important Posts

Exercises

Books

Categories
Blog Post

Didn’t Think About Attention While I Was Looking For Time – What I Learned In April

Intentional rest is hard.

The people who make the things that grab our attention are good at what they do.  Really good. Good to the point that you, as the owner of your time, get defensive when they, the takers of your time, go away.

I am no exception to any of that.

This month I turned off notifications, moved devices to other rooms, and left home for a few days. All of them were a panacea for my “rest” problem but I still need that connection to feel connected.

This is hard.

But, through this process, I began to step away from intellectualizing attention and step into understanding it. Attention is the partner of our time, and like it’s partner it’s always fragmented. However, unlike its partner, it is up to us to master it. Time is external (something we can’t effect) and attention is internal (something we can).

I started this month thinking it was all about time and left it understanding that there are levels to this I don’t understand yet. Attention popped up as a theme when I didn’t realize it was a big part of that.

It’s funny how focusing on not working lets me realize how much work there is to do. 

Biggest Lesson – Manage your attention and pay attention to the time.

My Correct Assumptions

  • Accountability matters.
  • Experimentation got me over a few humps.
  • Limited willpower bit me a lot, I need to create some better systems, but I learned plenty along the way.
  • Being deliberate is KEY!!!! If you don’t focus you won’t take any rest.
  • Opportunity Costs and FOMO were a doubt sandwich this month. The most effective use of time is somewhere in the middle.

My Incorrect Assumptions

  • Calendaring– My battle with calendars continues. 

Important Posts

Books

Categories
Blog Post

Persistence Also Means Pared Down – My Takeaways From March

Focus Focus Focus!

No one has a cheat code on life. You can’t run forever, you can’t dance to every song, and you don’t get to eat everything on the menu.

This month, more than any other, I realized we  have limited juice. Although I left my job, I’ve spent my time building relationships and building stuff (which is going to result in some launches in the next month 🙂 ). On top of that, I had to handle a sinus infection and working on attaining my altMBA. It was a sincere push on my time and resources. I got a lot done, so it couldn’t have been a better month to think about persistence.

If I had one takeaway from the month, it would be this: focus is the only way your persistence matters.

I only got through this month by recognizing I had to pare down.

Persistence is a gift, and a fleeting one at that because it means something only if it’s geared to push you over the finish line. You can’t do that if you are persistent in many things. You go nowhere being persistent in ten projects at once. It’s better to be persistent at one project ten times.

We have limited juice, and our spirit will “clock out” when we go too far.

Biggest Lesson – Focus is the only way your persistence matters

My Correct Assumptions

  • Be deliberate as possible
  • Selection is far more important than will (Focus!!!)

My Incorrect Assumptions

  • I need to schedule things to make sure they get done – I have to schedule some things and not others. Sometimes I work best with reminders. Sometimes I work best with it in the calendar. Sometimes I work better with just a list.

Important Posts

Books

 

Categories
Blog Post

Our Willpower Is Limited, Best To Not Push It (Thoughts on Feb. 2016)

Intentional Scarcity is Difficult

The biggest thing I realized this month is that saying no, even when you want to, is hard. Saying no when you don’t want to is almost impossible, unless there are the right conditions. We have limited willpower and we often underestimate the limit we have.  Also, each option and decision we have saps the supply of willpower. So, it is incredibly important to pick your spots because unless you don’t have a choice, you will fail if you try to change too much at once.  If you do fail, its important to manage the failure, understand what happened, and move forward.

I also learned that starting with nothing is best. The more tools you buy, the more monumental the task becomes. Even buying something like running shoes adds expectations to the task. That expectation adds pressure, and unless you are directing that pressure (accountability practices) you want to avoid as much of it as possible.  So, keep things simple, especially when you want to start something drastically different.   If you want to write, just start a Tumblr or WordPress. If you want to do videos, just shoot them on your camera and upload them to YouTube. Start working out with just one push-up.  By being intentionally scarce you remove pressure and increase the chance that you will follow through.

Biggest Lesson – Saying no is extremely difficult when your willpower is low, so pick your targets and take away options when you can.

My Correct Assumptions

  • There is a cap on Willpower

My Incorrect Assumptions

  • Defaulting to abundance with free time, I default to nothing, and that is helpful.
  • I should start a new habit by buying things first.

Important Posts

Videos

Books

Categories
Blog Post

Be Prepared! What I Learned In December 2015

I never got that ‘prepared’ thing

Being prepared never struck me as something that I needed to do. I loved the idea of playing the game off the cuff. Preparing is for people who aren’t in it for real, B players who think they got it, but they don’t.

I am glad you get older, so you learn how you get to see how wrong you were when you were younger.

I made this blog completely ahead of schedule this month. I cut my videos ahead, and I did my newsletters ahead of schedule. Just that alone allowed me to batch my work and experiment, which I think created a better blog to follow (hey…pictures and big type). Being prepared facilitated the change.

That was the big lesson this month, that preparation allows you freedom. I never would have come up with that idea unless I prepare, which gave me time to sit back and look at this blog holistically, instead of trying to create posts. So, come prepared.

Wins for the month

  • Production Time –  Wow, I didn’t notice how much time you add by doing things early. I got a chance to take a holistic look at the things I did, and they came out better.
    • Lesson: Try to get as much out as early as possible, and take a look at it before you get it into the world.
  • Questions – Being prepared leads to better questions. Do the reading and get that much more effective.
    • Lesson: Ask questions constantly. Ask questions before, during and after if you can. They make you sound better, and you learn a lot more.
  • Content–I saw everything get better.I opened up new avenues (hello Tumblr,LinkedIn,and Instagram), and learning every day through experimentation.
    • Lesson: A holistic view gives you a wide berth, then you connect. Content also feeds on itself. Produce more and more gets produced.

Losses for the month

  • Calendar  – I still haven’t done this one yet. I kicked it for a few days, but then I lost it again.
    • Lesson: Try different angles. There is more than one way.
  • Buffer–I got weird about this. I don’t know if it’s the right way anymore, but I never pursued this.
    • Lesson: Take more time to focus on the things that don’t feel right. 

Important Posts

Books

Videos

 

Note: Still experimenting with this post. I took out the notes for the other themes. Thinking about how do I add them here with more value than just a list. Added videos….so version 1.3? 

Categories
Blog Post

FOCUS! Getting Into November, a lot! What I Learned This Month.

 

Focus is hard.

That is why we avoid it. That is the biggest insight I came up with during this month. November is a busy time. People scramble to get the big “work” done before the holidays. Plans get drawn up for the travel that we do.  T’s get crossed and i’s get dotted, at least the ones we remember, so the focus is on family and some of the other stress that comes from that.

So, in the midst of all that, I decided to focus on “focus”. I ended up learning a lot, crafting some frameworks, and made an upgrade on my writing. I got to understand myself a little more, and I think taking what I learned from this month is a force multiplier that helps everything else I do.

Wins:

  • Fear–I went after fear a lot this month, and took it on in different ways. From breathing techniques, to frameworks, to meditation, I learned a ton about fear and some of the things that scare fear itself (preparation especially)
  • Video (New Thing) –  Like my newsletter last month, I started a video blog series. I think it gets better each week. Check them out here.
    • Lesson: Just do it.  Ship, and see the results. Experimentation is fine, no one is going to get you for shipping. If the world doesn’t like it, they will reject and look for the next thing you do all the same.
  • Vulnerability–I read a quote this month – “There are no boring subjects, just boring writers” that I used to just compartmentalized to writing, but it means a lot in conversation, work, and anything else we do. Taking responsibility makes for vulnerability, and we shy away from that.
    • Lesson: Talk to people and be honest and be interested. 
Losses:
  • Mediation  – I didn’t mediate. As much as negative visualization helped, I didn’t do a regular practice.
    • Lesson: Put something on your habits. Make them strong.
  • Anger–I didn’t make this a priority to deal with. I don’t know if any work got done.
    • Lesson: Start using the signs around me to help me focus. 
  • Habits – I fell out of a few habits this month.
    • Lesson: Add accountability.

Important Posts

Books

Habits

  • 5 Minute Journal–  Back in!
  • Doodling – In the morning.

Closing The Loop

  • Setting Aside a Time – Just set aside a time to do this every week. Try to keep a copy of things in front of you and batch this.

Emotional Intelligence

  • Negative Visualization – this one is a lot harder than it looks, and when it happens, feels painful. But it makes life easier.

Network

  • Barbershop Books – Board meeting and new plans.
  • Harlem Tech – Working on something interesting…can’t say too much.

Organization

  • Slowly GTD – Keeps going.
  • Buffer – Just keep it filled and learn some stuff.
Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started