At least, I don’t think there is.
I don’t think people fit some scheme or grand plan some “creator” made.
What reigns supreme, in my experience, is chaos.
“Order” is a narrative we use to make sense of chaos.
So, a few ideas based on this point of view:
The world is messy.
In 2015, I read over 100 books, most of which came out in 2015.
I started noticing something disturbing.
Most of them were saying the same thing.
Now, I don’t mean they were carbon copies of each other. I mean they stayed in the same boundaries.
Consider that most of them had:
I realized I didn’t read 100 different books. I read the same ten books written ten different ways each.
The philosopher Schopenhauer wrote this:
It is because people will only read what is the newest instead of what is the best of all ages, that writers remain in the narrow circle of prevailing ideas, and that the age sinks deeper and deeper in its own mire.
Any time you decide something, whether it’s inside or outside your comfort zone, circle of competence, or philosophy there is a chance to choose failure. Make enough decisions and it’s a certainty. There is no getting out of it either. No one stays undefeated.
What is a choice is how you frame it.
The best default is the first. But there are times where the other two have use.
I based my personality in “the know.” I was proud. I built opinions on “knowing” things. I judged people on how “much they knew.” My religion was my perception of knowledge and I made sure you knew it. If you didn’t know anything then why were we talking. I needed to talk to people who were confident, and if you didn’t know you are scared since you didn’t pick a side.
I don’t think that way anymore. In fact, I go in the opposite direction. I am more impressed in what you don’t know. Anyone who tells me they don’t know something gains that much more credibility in my book, I am more apt to trust them, and get curious about who they are and what they do “know.”
Studying human psychology, philosophy and management shifted my thinking. Spending time digging into Jiddu Kristamurti, Peter Drucker, and David McRaney, along with the ancients like Confucius, Socrates, and Seneca, got me to understand that the minute you think you know, you stop thinking.
One of my biggest influence in this line of thought is Robert Anton Wilson
In fact, the two thoughts (thinking and knowing) are diametrically opposed. When you know you don’t question, and if you don’t question you don’t think. You can’t know a subject and think about it. Your brain has already created the model and the brain hates moving on from what it “knows.” Thinking takes a ton of energy, knowing doesn’t.
Saying you don’t know is a direct assault on the ego, and the starting point to think about every subject you don’t know about. When I hear that, I get comfortable because I know that we can start to talk, and maybe an opinion can change. Talking to someone who knows is like talking to a brick wall. It may feel better to scream at that wall, but you aren’t going to change the form.
As the video points out, I’ve read almost 100 books this year. Like anything else that you do creatively, there are good, bad and ugly.
In the spirit of the time of year, I will spare you the bad and ugly, and present just the good. There is a lot of books that I haven’t captured here that are wonderful. Take a look at my Goodreads account and tweet me and I’ll give you a review on the book, or follow my Instagram account, where I leave book reviews to get an idea if a book will work for you.
First, I give the honorable mentions, a quick look at 5 books that I find tremendous and are surefire hits on my reread list. Then the top 5 books that changed my perspective.
Art of Learning Josh Waitzkin [Recommended by Tim Ferriss] – Critical guide to learning how to master any skill. Thinking of doing something new in 2016, pick this one up first.
Decisive Dan Heath & Chip Heath [Recommended by Shane Parrish] – Learn how to make decisions, and make them well.
Freedom From The Known Jiddu Krishnamurti [Recommended by Zo Williams] – In order to learn about something new, completely new, you have to get comfortable with the idea that you don’t know. All of this starts with self. This is a great primer.
The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph Ryan Holiday [ Recommended by Jason Mowatt] – While freedom from the known is a great way to pick up the big picture – This one is a fantastic primer on how to deal with the here and now. A catalyst for some experimentation I am doing (don’t worry, I will share the results of course)
Zero to One: Notes on Startups, or How to Build the Future Peter Thiel [Recommended by James Altucher] – Concepts concepts concepts. This is a go to book for anyone looking to build something that matters. If you’ve ever asked for my opinion on your idea, chances are one of my questions comes from this book.
Antifragile Nassim Nicholas Taleb [Recommended by Shane Parrish] – Great books change the path of your life, I think this one did for me. Antifragile discusses the idea of antifragility or, the idea of friction improving something, as opposed to things that are fragile, where friction destroys it. This book is full of wisdom, delivered in Nassim’s trademark brash style. At first, I considered it to effect just my financial decisions, until I realized that this idea is something that all decisions should go through, eventually slowing down and stopping my idea of getting an MBA.
You Can’t Make Me Angry Paul O. [ Recommended by Maria Popova ] – When I first bought this book, I thought it looked awful. The outside is that cheap laminate that bad workplace materials use and the design is terrible. But, I bought it after looking at Brain Pickings and Daring Greatly(the next book) did a ton for me. I am glad I did. This book, in plain English, forces you to take a look at your anger, and understand the control you cede by letting that anger run rampant. I changed how I dealt with my emotions after reading this, and become a much happier person.
Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead Brene Brown [Recommended by Maria Popova] As soon as I read this, I bought her entire bibliography. This book is that powerful. Brene Brown connects all the lessons such as dealing with vulnerability, how shame hurts in every situation, and beating ourselves leads no where with personal stories(where she leaves it out there) and anecdotes backed by tremendous research. By practicing what she preached in a book where she didn’t have to, she changed my life for the better. This book is the catalyst for improving my relationships everywhere in my life.
Prometheus Rising Robert Anton Wilson [Recommended by Zo Williams] – Mysticism always seemed a little woowoo to me. I just believed in science(rationalization), and as a kid, I turned my back on religion when I noticed what it did to people. So, when I got this book recommendation, I let it sit on the shelf and did what I usually do when I procrastinate – head to YouTube. After listening to Robert Anton Wilson on YouTube for a few clips, I realized the depth of his intelligence and started reading. He lays out an incredibly insightful book regarding the world of the spiritual, and more importantly, he gives you the ammunition to question, not just what you know but what he says. This book is full of experiments (some are time-consuming, I read this months ago and I still work through them) and humor. It also got me to realize that complete rationalization is a religion itself. Before picking this up, I thought all that stuff was mumbo jumbo – now I recognize that I don’t know – which is the greatest gift of all.
Becoming Richard Pryor Scott Saul[Recommended by Reddit] – Richard Pryor is one of my favorite comedians. It often amazes me that as a kid born after his prime, I can still look back on his routines and laugh. I fancy myself a Pryorphile – I pick up everything I can on him. So, when I got this book from a Reddit secret Santa I know I had to read it. This book goes into great detail, covering stretches of his life that are rarely talked about (his childhood) or stuff of legend (His Berkeley time) where most programs and books are happy to just scan over.The result is a masterful book, soul crushing and inspiring all at the same time, toeing a great line painting Pryor as a person turned an awful childhood into something the world enjoyed, but never quite shaking that self-destructive behavior around the people closest to him. Any fan of comedy should pick this up, but stretch before you do (It’s the biggest book on this list).
But don’t neglect yourself. Reading is compound knowledge that compounds. All ten are worth your time. Take some time to expand your abilities by sitting down with a great book, and if you need any more recommendations, feel free to reach out to me on Twitter @TheHonorableAT and lets talk.
[bctt tweet=”The way we think about ourselves … is as real as ghosts, and generate based on “bedtime stories” we tell ourselves.”]
A thought kept coming back to me – based on a saying from the Greek philosopher Heraclitus
You can’t step in the same river twice.
The river has changed permanently because you’ve interacted with it. You have changed permanently because the river has interacted with you.
We worry too much about the past. Outside of discrete lessons, everything else is fungible. Plainly speaking, most of our memories are wrong. In most respects, our past self is gone, and it isn’t coming back. We change when things happen to us. We can’t go backwards.
In the same breath, we think of the future. Our anxiety gets the best of us and we catastrophize. But, luckily, we get that wrong too. We are horrible at predicting the future.
The way we think about ourselves in the future and the past come from how we feel, what we ate, and what happened to us recently. They are no more real than ghosts, and they generate based on the “bedtime story” we tell ourselves.
All we have is the present. That is the gift. The river is the lesson, each time something happens to you, you change. Most things we brush off, but each instance comes with a teachable moment. Pay attention to it, and you just might find something interesting.
The past is the past and the future is the future. It already came and went. Your time is better served paying attention to the present, and listening to now. Take the lesson(the river) and recognize that you(the person) changed. That other person is dead. Embrace it. If you don’t like it, another lesson is coming shortly.
From the desk of Adam Thomas 