Our lives are complicated, beware of simple superficial solutions
One habit I am trying to get out of doing is telling someone:
“All you have to do is…”
Usually, the thing I say after that is simple. Situations are rarely that simple. When I make the mistake of saying something so “matter-of-factly” I miss steps. Usually, that makes someone feel worse.
Often, my answer comes from my experiences.I haven’t taken a moment to think about what they see, what information they have, or how they feel. I’m charging head first, often thinking of just me instead of the other person.
Then, its “solutions driven.” Solutions put you in a “firefighter mentality” where you start problem-solving. We love “problem-solving” because it’s easy and lets us wipe our hands of something. We get to go “on to the next.” Unfortunately, since life is a connected, complex symptoms, we lose context.
Instead of jumping in, it might just be better to listen.
From the desk of Adam Thomas 